Disgruntled Grunts In Iraq
by: Kathleen Kuntly, GOP Media Diva

All you Democrats out there, go ahead and call me a bitch, or a rank, two-bit-twat.   But while you're busy drooling over my perfect 36D tits, I think I should warn you that I know how the Hollywood liberal media operates. Yeah, call me what you will - I've been called many things - but this conservative media diva knows a good screwing when she sees it, or feels it. And, this neocon babe knows what a good blow job sounds like. How do you think I worked my way to the top?

This past week I witnessed Secretary Don Rumsfeld being drilled in the pooter as he became an object of desire for a liberal reporter from the small, hick-town of Chattanooga. What really got my panties in a bind was the way this "John Boy" reporter actually got a National Guardsman to do his dirty work. Yeah, all is fair in love and war, or at least that is what the liberals would have you believe.  We conservatives like our "war" the same way we like our "love", and we know that nothing is fair in either, because in the end someone gets f**ked in both situations!  We conservatives also  like our loving to be kept quiet and secret - much like the way we conduct war - and we don't like people who tell our dirty little secrets!

I want everybody to understand a certain fact that everyone is forgetting in the story about armor shortages in Iraq. That fact is these soldiers are griping about having to perform their jobs!  Hey, I should know, for I have bedded many a G.I. Joe and have heard the constant naysaying by these lazy ill-trained members of the Clinton military.  "I can't go again, baby." or "You rode me too hard." or "I can't watch while you do my buddy!"  Yeah all these complaints have come my way, but I always say to them, "You f**k with what you have and not with what you want!" 

Secretary Don Rumsfeld knows that fighting men are for fighting, and that all fighting men complain about being fighting men. He also knows that the best way to keep a soldier's attention is to make him keep fighting!  Oh sure, this one National Guardsman had a sob story to tell about armor, but really is this Secretary Rumsfeld's fault?  How much do we have to give these guys over there fighting in Iraq?  It sounds like they just want more handouts and entitlements in the form of body armor.  Well, cry me a river, I mean, haven't we given them all they have asked for, except extra troops, more pay, more armor, an exit strategy, and time off?  Yet these so-called soldiers are putting Secretary Don Rumsfeld into an embarrassing situation. That is gratitude for you.  Secretary Rumsfeld has given these young men a job to do!  What happened to doing an honest day's work?

Secretary Rumsfeld and other Republicans can't be blamed for shortages in this war. President Bush has already declared the, "Mission Accomplished" almost two years ago now. It isn't the fault of Secretary Rumsfeld that these so-called soldiers are having problems.  Hey, he told them it was going to be a long hard slog, but they didn't listen, and now they are having to work for their money!  Yeah, that's right, I said work for their money, because lets face it, for too long these troops were not at war and they received their government checks every month!  Our troops became fat and lazy slobs just like the Union Democrats.  Don't they have any morals and values? 

What we have here is disgruntled grunts acting like liberal weenies. "Oh, poor, poor, pitiful me - I don't have any armor and I'm in a war zone."  Those disgruntled grunts say.  Well cry me a river, and then undo my bra and fondle my 36D tits!  Hey, get over it disgruntled grunts - you joined the service and now it is time for Uncle Sam to get a nice return on his investment!

Yeah, go ahead and lift my skirt up past my navel, then slip my white, silk, panties down to my ankles. Yeah, then probe me in my "valley of honey" with your fingers. Yeah, make me hot and wet!  You paid for it, now come and get it!  You won't hear me complaining about my lack of armor - no, I will gladly get my cooter filled with projectiles, if that is what it takes for me to do my part in the War On Terror.  Maybe the disgruntled grunts should shut up and do as this blonde bombshell does:   Take it.  Take all of it, and let Uncle Sam know how much you like it!

Kathleen Kuntly

1975:  Graduates All Girls Private School, gets pregnant, has abortion    1976:  Enrolls at All Girls College, gets pregnant, has abortion    1977:  Dad leaves Kathleen's mom for a guy that used to date Kathleen    1979:  Graduates College    1980:  Princeton Law school, head of Princeton Anti-Abortion League    1981:  Leaves Princeton, pregnant, has abortion    1982:  Harvard Law School, Head of Harvard Anti Abortion League    1983:  Leaves Harvard, pregnant, has abortion    1984:  Obtains law degree from Church of the Giving College              via the mail, becomes anti abortion advocate for the college    1985:  Goes to work in White House for I. Fester Auspice    1986:  Time off to have baby out of wedlock, Lobbies against Single Mothers    1987:  Comes back to work in White House    1988:  Leaves White House to work for I. Fester Auspice    1989:  Time off to have another baby, still not married    1990:  Starts woman against abortion and for adoption    1991:  Works for I. Fester Auspice once more    1992:  Time off to have another baby    1993:  Works for George W. Bush in Texas    1994:  Works once more for I. Fester Auspice    1995:  Time off from work to heal from unidentified sexual illness.    1996:  Writes for Conservative Magazine    1997:  Writes Book, Traitors:  Liberal Shit Up To My Tits    1998:  Columnist    2003:  RepublicanPress.com